Sunday morning

It's a Sunday morning and I'm already up and about.
It's a Sunday morning and I'm going to the hospital in a few minutes to clerk cases for tomorrow's class.

It's a Sunday morning.

This is absurd.
I think I'm loosing my life slowly but surely.
*Tsk tsk*

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Sweet love

Again...my Cinta surprised me. He sent me gorgeous flowers..for no apparent reason at all.
Sgt sweet la kan.
Told you he's the most amazing guy on earth. Hehe.

Other than that, nothing really interesting happened today...or this week for that matter...it has been an embarrassingly boring week *yawn*
Owhhh...I finally clean up my dusty dusty room...wohooo...it's an achievement, really. Just ask my housemates..=p

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I am a believer

I have never been a fan of magic shows; especially the ones with big stage, pretty girls in skimpy outfits, chopping people off in half and make planes disappear, things like that.
But that's not the deal for David Blaine.
Who does not know who David Blaine is. The one with the on-the-spot magic tricks...and recently, the one in-the-water-tank-for-a-week. I was channel surfing the other day and there was this show called (surprise, surprise) "David Blaine: Street Magic"...he took magic tricks to a whole new level I tell ya. With no strings attached to him, he floated...phowarrrr...the people tried to check for any strings that might just lifted him up but there werent any. Hmph..mind boggling.
There was also this slot where he asked the people watching at home to think of a card. Whichever card from the deck. Choose any type of card and think hard and look straight into his eyes...and guess what, freakingly enough, he guessed it right! I freaked out for a little while but continued watching the show. There was a second segment which was similar to the one before. He asked the viewers to think of a number...just any 2 digits odd numbers and think hard and again, look into his eyes...and yes, he guessed it right again! I was sooo creeped out I actually switched off the TV. No more freakiness for the night, please.
*the vid below is different. another trick*
Maybe he's practicing some kind of black magic to read people's mind. Or if not, he's from another planet. Haha..those are the only explanations I can think of. Leo DiCaprio (the host of the show) asked him how in the world he does that trick..the one that can read people's mind...Blaine said that it's just his intuition. Hmmm...yeah...how come all of us don't have that kind of intuition? Might come in handy especially during exams..hehe..

I can't help but to notice that he seemed weirdly calm and kinda doped up.
Street magic is way better than those on big stage with illusion tricks.
It's more believable.

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Next..

Obstetrics and Gynaecology
Primary Care Medicine

Yay! Did the exam this morning. Well...weren't the best papers I've ever sit for...=( but never mind..the important thing is that I'm finished with these two..and I'm in PJ now..enjoying myself..hehe

Next up, surgery...where all the lumps and bumps are.

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When doctors rant

I was blog hopping and I came across this really interesting entry from a doctor's blog (Stand Up!). From what I've heard from other senior doctors I've met, they basically told me the same stuff and I personally have seen it first hand during my O&G posting on my on-call nights. The HOs, junior MOs, MOs, and even specialist work their a$$ off. I just hope that by the time I graduate, things will be different. Hope it'll be different for the better that is. Here's the entry which I find interesting..

Malaysian Govt Doctors Criteria

Criterias for becoming a Malaysian Govt Doctor. Theres no need for an aptitude test. Students should consider these requirements:

1. No life outside medicine; this includes dating, sports, clubbing, chores for your parents and visiting the toilet

2. Not to live with your parents. Move out ASAP as they will never understand the ludicrous working hours that u go through. Furthermore, chores are not suitable for u as to rule No. 1.

3. Not to be married until completion of all 4 years of Govt Compulsory service as u will be transferred left and right to some of the most remote Govt clinics in Malaysia. Having wife and kids to follow you to your new working area may increase high level of stress on all parties. Furthermore, if your spouse is a Govt Doctor, he/she will also be transferred away from u and no matter what appeal is made, KKM will put up a deaf ear (unless u have big cables or of a certain skin color).

4. If married, no to have children until u finish all 4 years of Govt Compulsory service, as to which u and your spouse will not have much time for your child/children or they end up not recognizing u and refer the Indonesian maid as their mother (change in language patterns commonly follow).

5. To obtain life insurance once your govt service begins as there is not many claims for accidents during work. Don't be fooled, Doctoring in Malaysia is hazardous.

6. Able to withstand 36 hours of non stop work and stress without mistakenly labeling Left for Right or uvula for vulva (or Volvo S40)

7. To buy a car with complete safety features (like I'm doing) which includes multiple airbags, ABS, EBD, side-front-rear-top-parallel and diagonal impact bars and seat belts to ensure survivability if u are involved in an accident because your driving resembled a drunkard maniac after working in the hospital for 40 hrs non stop.

8. Constant supply of coffee

9. Nicotine Patch as u will have the urge to start smoking due to overwhelming stress

10. Interest in watching medical sitcoms such as House MD, Scrubs, ER, Grays Anatomy and Chicago Hope to inspire u to continue your life as a doctor as the exciting things u see on TV does not resemble the real life of a Malaysian govt doctor.

11. Not to have any pets or plants (not even cactuses) as u will have no time to feed or care for them and eventually all will end up in your mortuary.

12. Able to endure the stench of your own sweat as to when 36 hours "on call" does not permit u time to bathe or freshen up.

13. Able to carry on working without food or water over 15 hours. ( I was in OT for 16 hrs without food, water or bathroom breaks). If during fasting month, able to break your fast with “water for injection” as u had no time to buy food.

14. Able to come to work with fever/cough/illness or physical disability (sprained ankle etc) as to which doctors do not deserve MCs. (My MO was on crutches during rounds)

15. Able to stand scolding, destructive criticism, kiss ass behaviors, racial bias, finger pointing, scape goating, and in competency from your superiors.

16. Able to withstand the jealousy when your friends call u up for some fun and ur stuck in the hospital during on call.

And here's another one which is interesting but really true. I've seen it first hand.

Only the dumb ones do it...(no disrespect, I'm doing it too)

As depicted by this poor, tired doctor, its quite clear how hectic and busy a Malaysian Govt Doctor's life is. May I add that in some M'sian govt Hospitals, doctors work 40Hrs in a stretch because those on call do not get their day off on the next. They are to continue till 5pm which eventually ends around 7pm. And these tired, worn out doctors are basically zombies after a very busy and hectic night. Mind u, doctors don't work sitting on their a$$. Our night involves running like lemmings here and there to pursue cases, results, set lines, attend to dying patients, face an angry relative or merely to sign an MC at 4o'clock in the morning. We sometimes run to obtain vital blood results, climb on beds to conduct CPR, sweat in thick gowns in 7 hour night long surgeries, prick our fingers while taking blood, get scolded by patients for not "smiling", write case summaries, beg with the blood bank MOs to get blood bags, and the list goes on..... There are times that the body works on its own without the direct control of the mind. And falling asleep during procedures or interviewing is almost a normal thing. And knowing that when u go home to enjoy your 12hr rest, the 36 hr on call will begin again when u wake up (Every Other Day - EOD).

Govt doctors in Malaysia work 36 hours non stop!! Thats the main message to get acrross. Theres no glamour here, theres no respect, theres no glory. When u save a life, its just a pat on the back, and when u fail, its your mistakes and faults. We go home after on call only wishing to sleep and prepare for the body for the next one. Imagine doing this for one year or more!! Saturday Sunday included!! No life definitely!! And for what? A mere RM 2185 per month and RM 150 per call. Most of us don't have the luxury to spend that money.

Keep in mind, govt Hospitals wish to seek ISO 9001 approvals. It makes u wonder, are they more concerned about facilities available or the service provided? If a tired doctor comes and sees u at 5am in the moring, ask them this very wonderful question, "Tak balik ke?"

Hehe...well..this doctor is just venting his anger and voicing out his disappointment and I guess he is just trying to survive in this cruel yet noble job. Cruel to the doctors that is.

And here I am..complaining about exams and postings..the 2 entries by Stand Up! are an eye opener for me...the kind of things I will be facing and vaguely gave me the idea how the real world will be like. I said vaguely cause I know that whatever I read is just 10% of it. I have to go through all that to really know what it's really like. But this is what I've chose, so those are the things I will be facing later and there's really no point complaining.

But I guess that will be in 2 years from now.
Still got time to ronggeng.
Ngeeee.
=p

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3 down, 4 more to go

My end-of-posting exam is in 2 days~~
Really need to study. A lot of things to read...but as usual...malas.
I've promised myself to study really hard after my medicine posting..or at least not to procrastinate so that I'll have enough time to study everything when I'm in OBGYN n PCM posting..bleah~ konon aje...=p
Referring to the entry title, I have completed another posting..Primary Care Medicine and seriously, I've learnt a lot! Even though I've missed a few sessions due to my fever, I managed to cover my clinic duties. I've gained a lot of experience (am now a self-proclaimed pro in drawing out blood, taking blood pressure, blood glucose, wound dressing, and best of all, set up catheterized urine drainage bag..hehe) and I saw the differences between government clinics and private clinics. Surprise surprise, there are a lot of differences, especially the most obvious one is the doctor-patient relationships. The doctors in government clinics usually don't spend much time with the patients, asking about their psychological and social(family, friends, work) stuff..this may be due to the fact that there were hundreds of people waiting outside; while in private General Practitioner clinics, the doctor usually spend more time with the patients and has already built a good rapport with the patients and their family members as well.
Being a GP is not as easy as it may seem. A GP doesn't know what kind of patient/disease that will come through the door. They have to be alert for all the signs and symptoms and a GP has to know everything..every single system in the body..plus the psychiatric side for those with depression, anxiety, and even schizo or mania. I will not say "He/She is just a GP" anymore. I have gained extra respect for them. They are the front liners, and to quote one of the GPs, they are the watch dogs.
Well..all in all, I've enjoyed my Primary Care Medicine posting..but I'm not looking forward for the exam. Bleah~
Wish me luck, peeps.

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Wait, waiting, waited

Long ago, men went to the sea, and women waited for them, standing on the edge of water, scanning the horizon for the tiny ship.
Now, I'm waiting for my love.
I'm waiting for him, scanning the sky for the tiny aeroplane.
Each moment that I wait feels like a year.
Each moment I can see infinite moments lined up, waiting.
He is coming back, and I'm here, waiting.

Why is love intensified by absence?

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A guideline?

Ngeh.

Masks in class

I was moments away from fainting in the clinic in front of hundreds of patients. Yeah..I was really that sick this morning.
I decided to go to the clinic this morning despite the fact that I was feeling drowsy and tired since I have missed quite a number of classes and plus, I still don't have any MC slip. I was sitting in the treatment room, helping the nurse out with the polio vaccine and MMR injections to give to the children when suddenly I felt dizzy..went to the toilet and on my way back to the room, my vision went blurry with black spots. I quickly sat down and after a while I decided to just go back home. Slept for 4 hours after that, felt better, and went to college for a Problem Solving session.
Drama eh? Ngeh.
Btw, there were two of us who were sick and were coughing like nobody's business in the PBL class just now and guess what..the lecturer actually made us wear a mask! He actually went all the way to the Clinical Skills Lab to get masks for me and Rushdy. So, nak tak nak, both of us had to wear masks the whole time we were in his class.
Bleah.
I don't feel like going tomorrow but I have to. Shall sleep earlier than usual tonight so I'll have enough rest.
I don't like fever.
Hmpfh.

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Fever-ing

I couldn't get out from my bed for 2 straight days..I been sleeping the whole weekend. My weekend flew just like that. I've never been this sick for years and fortunately today the fever is subsiding and I'm feeling better already. I had high temperature and cold sweats, cough that made my chest hurt, running nose that gave me a clown's nose, and heavy heavy blood-shot eyes that needed to be shut all the time.
I really think that there's a fever outbreak in Ipoh currently cause I just heard that two of my classmates were admitted to the hospital due to high fever. Scary eh..luckily (or so I think), I was stubborn enough not to go to the clinic..the doctor might just want to admit me to the hospital along with my other classmates..heh.
Yes, I'm that person. I'm that type of person who doesn't like to go to clinic and see doctors unless it is really necessary. Heck, I don't even take pills (panadol n such) unless I really can't bear with the pain anymore. Don't ask me why..it's not that I'm scared or anything..I just don't. Ans yes, my housemates and boyfriend has been bugging me about that for years now..
By the way, this might be long overdue, but I want to congratulate my younger sister, Farah, for getting straight A's for her SPM!! hehe...we're so proud of you Farah..you have a bright bright future in front of you and good luck k..apply betul2! =)

Ugh..tomorrow...shall drag my lazy ass, feverish self for another day in the clinic..
Dang.